Meet the face of Lancôme’s new scent “Pure Evil”- David Motari

Do you know David Motari?  If you don’t, keep reading.  If you do, kindly send me his address and cell number cause I’m feeling deranged.  That’s right Motari, live in fear.  God, I love Internet justice.  It’s like Walker Texas Ranger but with a 14-year-old hacker with acne from New Jersey.  I digress.

David Motari is the ‘star’ of a new viral You Tube video currently making a cyber tsunami.  The video depicts David, a Marine Lance Corporal serving in Iraq, throwing a puppy YES A PUPPY off of a cliff.  The video is disturbing to say the least.  Immediately after watching it, I had an unstoppable urge to:

a) Harm inanimates with my desk stapler*

b) Send a thinly veiled threat to Mr. Motari**

c) Stop eating meat***

d) Join a gym and get stacked ala GI Jane then quit my job and start stalking and harassing Mr. Motari until the thought of death would seem like a blessed reprieve****

This guy is a mother fucking dirt bag.  After I reacted so viscerally to this video, I wondered why seeing him throw a puppy was more disturbing to me than any of the other war images I’ve seen out of Iraq.  I think that it has something to do with the fact that puppies are like children- they are defenseless, they are dependent on us and sometimes they poop on our carpet.  In a weird way, they are the very symbol of how far humans have come. 

The fact that humanity has risen above the most basic ‘survival of the fittest’ and fostered a rich civilization in which we no longer have to worry about wooly mammoths and surviving minute to minute but can do things like paint pictures, listen to books on tape and lots of other stupid/beautiful things like take care of adorable but kind of useless (in a Darwinian sense) pets and those less fortunate than us is astounding and powerful and completely amazing.  This douche bag just took all that and threw it off a cliff.  How’s that for a fucking metaphor?

*R.I.P. Mr. tape dispenser- you dispensed so well.

**Consider this said threat fucker ;)

***After careful thought, I’ve compromised and will no longer be eating puppy meat.

****Luckily for you, Mr. Motari, I hate gyms almost as much as I hate animal cruelty.